Ode to my (most recent) stalker

Oh stalker man oh stalker man
I know you long to lick me
Oh stalker man oh stalker man
You really are so creepy

You say you want to eat my c***
You have no problem being blunt
You have begun your scary hunt
But it’s your stalking I wish to stunt

You laugh and call your friends bitches
And call women skanks and witches
You casually reach down when your testicle itches
And moan that women just want men with riches

Here is some advice for you
Let me give ya a clue or two
I will speak truth until my face is blue
And you will be mincemeat when I am through

Women want to be with men, not foolish boys
We want to be with those who talk with us, not just fill the air with noise
We want to be with stand up guys who honor us, and don’t treat us like toys
And we want our males to be gentlemen, filled with manners and poise

When you can do that, you might stand a chance
And with your new humility, we may let you advance
It’s possible we could give you a second chance
Although I wouldn’t hold my breath that there will be a romance

But until that time, please steer clear
Go drink alone, face in your beer
Complain about us, with a nasty sneer
We women of character don’t care…our vision is crystal clear
We know who we are, and what we are worth–we are not souvenirs
Please understand I am being sincere

When I ask you
To go away from here…

And leave me alone.

5 thoughts on “Ode to my (most recent) stalker

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