Mystery foods…(or, my not so secret hobby…)

I’m struggling with what I want to write about today.

I really, really, really want to write about this totally shitty thing that has happened in my life…but for now…for a few reasons…I have to keep mum.

And, I am trying to move on, past the anger and betrayal. Which is REALLY FREAKING HARD. (Insert y’all for the southern readers. I don’t discriminate.)

So instead I’m going to write about the fact that I’m going back on stage May 10th. That’s right. I do stand up comedy. I started in the fall. It’s not a paying gig (yet) and it is one of the scariest things I have ever done. I haven’t been on stage since February when this cosmic event in my life occurred. Getting back on stage..is a tremendous act of bravery and a bit of defiance.

Take that, you life vampires.

I think this set on stage…I’m going to talk about vacationing with our kids…and then talk about the difference between my childhood and kids today–from our over protection, to the very foods we eat (mystery jello anybody? the more chunks, the merrier…) Meat in a can, Tang (it had to be good for you–the astronauts drank it, right?? Didn’t they??) Miracle Whip–on or in everything–along with miniature marshmallows…and now how everything is organic, pesticide free, freaking healthy..I’m working the set out. Will let you know how it goes.

In light of this, here is my question for you gentle readers..what is the craziest or worst thing you remember eating as a child? Mystery casserole? Meatloaf? Tell me about it. I could use it in my act.

If I make it to Ellen someday, I will give a shout out to you.

Let the food choices fly…

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